I was at the Dallas airport late last night and two guys were sharing a political outrage about an event that seemed so patently indefensible to them. I was too tired to go into reflexive battle mode and for everyone’s sake thank God. Your piece made me realize something I didn’t even think about: the basic idea that if I accepted their premises I’d be outraged too. It’s hard to remember empathy but it sure gets better results than going to battle in the gate waiting area.
Glad it was food for thought. And ain't that the rub - it's tough to be empathetic when people are polarized to the point of outrage, but without it we're pretty much all just a bunch of scared shitless people defending our own experiences.
Awwww, Eric. Thank you for the mention! You've been such an enthusiastic reader and as I learn more about your story, there are many parallels to our unfolding. I'm saving this post to read tonight. Already looking forward to it!
Ok, back sooner than expected. Of course, this chapter resonates DEEPLY with me. I used to be the person shouting "if you can believe it you can do it" until my own life had a different lesson for me. I can't remember if I've mentioned @veronikabond to you... I think you'll appreciate her work and understanding of the importance of honoring the "compost" and all the layers of personal history, trauma, and using it to catalyze healing. I had a bit of an aha moment the other day... the old unfixed tagline reads: Not Fixed but Far From Broken. And I just realized a think an even more profoundly true tag would read: When Being Broken is the Fix.
"New neural pathways could be seeded and cultivated all day long, but the existing ones needed to be churned up and composted before anything else could take root. It wasn’t his job to “save” anyone – only to share his recovery experience with as much clarity and compassion as possible, planting seeds and trusting that they might germinate with just the right person at just the right time."
I was that person too, and think there's still some truth in it, but stronger undercurrents gave me a similar lesson.
:) Veronika was one of the first to comment on the very first chapter of Coincidence Speaks. Her work is brilliant. Glad you guys have connected.
"When Being Broken is the Fix" - I love it! Also love how the "When" subtly highlights the temporality/impermanence of brokenness itself. To me it seems like you are redefining what "Fixed" actually means through your work.
"It wasn’t his job to “save” anyone – only to share his recovery experience with as much clarity and compassion as possible, planting seeds and trusting that they might germinate with just the right person at just the right time. " This is the profound realisation we all seem to need to arrive at somehow after a life changing experience.
I remember reading (in my New Age/ Selfhelp - phase) countless stories by people who had gone through some sh*t and came out somehow "healed and enlightened" the other side. In the intro they would regularly write sth. along the lines of: "I'm sharing this (... insert life-challenge...) so you don't have to go through the same cr*p..."
And I used to think 'If anyone could protect anyone else from their own life, we would surely have saved the world by now... not even Jesus managed to crack this...'
I was at the Dallas airport late last night and two guys were sharing a political outrage about an event that seemed so patently indefensible to them. I was too tired to go into reflexive battle mode and for everyone’s sake thank God. Your piece made me realize something I didn’t even think about: the basic idea that if I accepted their premises I’d be outraged too. It’s hard to remember empathy but it sure gets better results than going to battle in the gate waiting area.
Glad it was food for thought. And ain't that the rub - it's tough to be empathetic when people are polarized to the point of outrage, but without it we're pretty much all just a bunch of scared shitless people defending our own experiences.
Thanks so much for the mention E.T. I'm honored that something I wrote moved you in the right direction.
Awwww, Eric. Thank you for the mention! You've been such an enthusiastic reader and as I learn more about your story, there are many parallels to our unfolding. I'm saving this post to read tonight. Already looking forward to it!
Thanks Kimberly! The parallels are purely coincidental I'm sure. :)
Ok, back sooner than expected. Of course, this chapter resonates DEEPLY with me. I used to be the person shouting "if you can believe it you can do it" until my own life had a different lesson for me. I can't remember if I've mentioned @veronikabond to you... I think you'll appreciate her work and understanding of the importance of honoring the "compost" and all the layers of personal history, trauma, and using it to catalyze healing. I had a bit of an aha moment the other day... the old unfixed tagline reads: Not Fixed but Far From Broken. And I just realized a think an even more profoundly true tag would read: When Being Broken is the Fix.
"New neural pathways could be seeded and cultivated all day long, but the existing ones needed to be churned up and composted before anything else could take root. It wasn’t his job to “save” anyone – only to share his recovery experience with as much clarity and compassion as possible, planting seeds and trusting that they might germinate with just the right person at just the right time."
OK so that's weird - I wrote a comment and it posted twice, so I deleted one of them, and POOF, they're both gone. 🤔
Anywho, pretty sure it went something like:
I was that person too, and think there's still some truth in it, but stronger undercurrents gave me a similar lesson.
:) Veronika was one of the first to comment on the very first chapter of Coincidence Speaks. Her work is brilliant. Glad you guys have connected.
"When Being Broken is the Fix" - I love it! Also love how the "When" subtly highlights the temporality/impermanence of brokenness itself. To me it seems like you are redefining what "Fixed" actually means through your work.
"It wasn’t his job to “save” anyone – only to share his recovery experience with as much clarity and compassion as possible, planting seeds and trusting that they might germinate with just the right person at just the right time. " This is the profound realisation we all seem to need to arrive at somehow after a life changing experience.
I remember reading (in my New Age/ Selfhelp - phase) countless stories by people who had gone through some sh*t and came out somehow "healed and enlightened" the other side. In the intro they would regularly write sth. along the lines of: "I'm sharing this (... insert life-challenge...) so you don't have to go through the same cr*p..."
And I used to think 'If anyone could protect anyone else from their own life, we would surely have saved the world by now... not even Jesus managed to crack this...'
Great chapter 💕🙏